Aaaaaah!

Last night I was doing wonderful, had 738 cals all day and then I made dinner for my hubby when he came home from work around 8:30 pm. I made whole wheat pasta with vodka sauce, and sourdough bread. It sounded so good, so I had a little and that just made me hungrier so I had a little more. I also had a little sourdough bread with butter. All together I had around 1639 calories! I was in that "I wanna lose weight but, I also want to feel like I can live a normal life and have dinner with my hubby" Well, newsflash! Nothing when it comes to food or how I feel when I eat is normal. I felt super guilty last night and my belly felt huge! Today I think I will be up in weight and so now I am really frustrated! But, what can I do now? Well, I can fall off the wagon, keep eating like hell and get even bigger or I can get right back on to my plan of 500 to 1000 calories and make today a better day! I think the latter sounds much more brilliant, why keep the pain going? Nip it in the bud and be strong and change damnit! Why am I so lame that I have to give into spaghetti? Last time I looked it was not stronger than me! Today... no beer, lots of water, and no sweets. Yeah, good plan